We have decided on a name for this little guy. And I thought it would also be the perfect time to tell you his story thus far, and how that contributed to his name.
In 19 or so weeks, you will all meet Nolan Jude
It took us 16 very long months to conceive Nolan. In October of ‘07, I told my Dr. I was concerned because we had been trying since around April of that year. He sent Nate to the Dr. and scheduled me for a very painful procedure called an HSG. After that, we still were not having any luck, so my Dr. sent us to a Reproduction Specialist.
And this sounds very silly, but in the meantime, I was mourning the loss of not only our children being close in age, but for me to be pregnant in Erin & Dude’s wedding. Erin had told me for years that she wanted me pregnant walking down her isle, and that dream just wasn’t coming true. Every month she would ask, and every month I would disappoint. Not only her, but mostly myself. It just didn’t make any sense. In June of 2005, while Nate and I were on vacation with our family, we decided that we wanted to have a baby. By the end of July, we were pregnant with B. So why was it so hard this time?
For those that don’t know, Nate is almost 4 years younger than his oldest brother, Ben. I always knew that Nate’s middle name was Jude because Kathy prayed to St. Jude to conceive him. What I didn’t know is that our situation was mirroring theirs. One day before our first appointment with the Reproduction Specialist, Kathy pulled out the exact St. Jude prayer card she used with Nate, and handed it to me. I put it in my wallet, carried it with me wherever I went, and pulled it out everyday.
Our first appointment was at the end of April. Lots of talk and bloodwork and meds later, the Specialist told us that he would not schedule our insemination because my eggs were not fully developing, and there was absolutely no chance of me getting pregnant that month (June). Obviously devastated by the news, the Dr. told me to take a drug called Prometrium to speed up the process to begin my next cycle. Prometrium is just the hormone progesterone. After a couple days of hard thinking, I declined the drug. It made no sense to me to put a hormone in my body when my body did what it was supposed to do on its own. And there was always that what if?
Well, June 21st came along, and after a good cry with Erin, we walked her down the isle. It was a beautiful wedding, and we danced and drank the night away. I was due to start my next round of meds that night because I had started what I thought was going to be my period 5 days earlier. So I took the pill, not thinking anything of it.
Well, I woke up the next morning, and just didn’t feel right. Not knowing if the was the effects of the alcohol or something different, I got out of bed, and just dazed around the room. Nate woke up, looked at me a little crooked, and I replied, “I hid something from myself, and I don’t know where it is“. My dear husband knows me entirely too well, and replied, “It is downstairs in the kitchen drawer“. I would buy pregnancy tests and hide them every month. I would take them, and when they showed up negative, which they always did, I would stuff them down in a garbage can so Nate didn’t see them. I decided that there was no reason for him to share in my deep, dark, bad day every month. So I took the test, and walked away, just like I did every 15 months prior.
About 45 minutes later, realizing that I had forgotten about the test, I went back in the bathroom to throw it away. I almost didn’t look at it, but something caught my eye. Yep, there was a second line there! And 3 more tests later, it was confirmed – we were having baby #2, due on Nate’s birthday, and I WAS pregnant at Erin’s wedding. How is that for irony?
So even though Nolan hasn’t arrived yet, he has already taught us so many life lessons:
#1 is patience, even though I still haven’t mastered that one yet. I learned to take my depression and push it away. I had to be thankful for the life we did have, and enjoy what I had surrounding me.
#2 is our faith in God. Everything happens for a reason.
#3 is that Doctor’s aren’t always right. Always listen to your body, and question.
A couple weeks and confirming blood tests later, Brayden handed the St. Jude prayer card back to his Grandma and said, “It worked!”. So, Brayden was due the day before Ben’s birthday, and Nolan is due on his daddy’s birthday….As much as I love my boys, I really hope this doesn’t mean I am going to completely mirror my Mother-in-Law and have 4 of them…..Just one girl please